"But as many as received him [Christ], to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name:" (John 1:12).

Mrs. Everest, are you absolutely sure that you saw my client leaving the store with a plastic bird bath underneath his raincoat?"
"Yes.   I saw it with my own eyes."
     "You're sure it was my client?   Look!   Take a close look at his face.   Are you sure it was him, at the store, on the alleged day?"
     "Young man, I don't forget faces or dates."
     "It's interesting that you should mention DATES, Mrs. Everest.   Your Honor, I wish to show the jury that Mrs. Everest is unreliable when it comes to remembering important dates . . . Mrs. Everest, are you a Christian?"
     "Why, of course!"
     "Then, could you please tell the jury, on what day did you become a Christian?"
     "Why . . . I've . . . I've always been one."
     "So you admit that you can't remember when it was, huh?   And yet you sit there, willing to trust that same memory, and send my client to the chair?"
     "But there's no specific date to remember.   I've always--"
     "AH HA!   So now you admit that there is no date.   You never became a Christian in the first place!   Your Honor, I ask that she be--"
     "BUT I AM A CHRISTIAN!"
     "Then when did you become one?   Tell the jury.   When?   WHEN?"
     "I told you!   There is no exact date, per se."
     "So you're finally admitting you never became one.   You're a fraud, Mrs. Everest.
Perhaps it was you who stole the bird bath and are now trying to frame my client."
     "But I wouldn't steal.   I'm a Christian!"
     "THEN TELL US!   Tell us when you became one.   This is your last chance!"
     "VERY WELL!   If you insist on a stupid date, I suppose it was when I was baptized!"
     "And when was that, Mrs. Everest?"
     "I think it was sometime in January of 1947."
     "AH HA!   So there is a date.   You've been lying to the court all along.   Why didn't you reveal it before?   What are you trying to hide?   Is that when your lust for bird baths began?"
     "Don't be absurd!   I was an infant at the time."
     "An infant?   And you expect this court to believe that as an infant you were already acting like a Christian?"
     "No!   At that age how could I have possibly conducted myself as a Christian?   I wasn't even aware of the fact that I was one."
     "AH HA!   How could you have been a Christian without knowing it?   I propose that all this is a desperate attempt at trying to confuse the jury.   But it won't work, Mrs. Everest.   What are you really trying to cover up?   You wouldn't by chance be the mastermind behind an international bird bath theft ring?   Is that what this is all about?
HUH?   FESS UP!   COME CLEAN!"
     "THIS IS RIDICULOUS!   He's the one on trial.   He's the thief."
     "I SEE!   So now you're blame shifting!   It won't work Mrs. Everest.   You hear me?
Your clever disguise has been revealed . . . And you call yourself a Christian."
     "But I am one!   I've always been one!"
     "Your Honor, we're wasting time.   Mrs. Everest is totally unreliable as a witness.   She has delusions of being a Christian when she can't even point to a time when she supposedly became one.   To make matters worse, her mental illness is fueled by her consuming obsession with stealing bird baths, which began as an infant.   Therefore, I ask for a dismissal of this case as well as recommend a court order preventing Mrs. Everest from ever giving water to another bird again.   I rest my case."

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